Promises that Lie

I wanted to share everything I had written throughout my time in rehab. I didn’t feel like it captured the very essence of my active addiction.

And then I came across this poem I wrote during of my group sessions:

I promised myself I would never compromise my values. I lied.

I promised myself I would treat myself with more love respect “next time.” I lied.

I promised myself I would be kinder to those who loved me. I lied.

I promised myself I would visit my family more. I lied.

I promised myself I wouldn’t use again. I lied. 

I promised myself I would get the help I needed (after using one last time). I lied.

I promised my sister I would be home to see my niece and nephew. I lied.

I promised my therapist I would schedule an appointment to discuss rehab options. I lied.

I promised my father that I was doing the “right” thing. I lied.

I promised my mother that “I was fine.” I lied.

I promised God I would start listening to Her instead of the drugs. I lied.

I promised I would never sell my soul to feed my addiction. I lied.

I promised myself I would never let the drugs and alcohol get out of control.

It did. 

I promised myself and my family that I would do whatever it takes to live one day at a time, clean, sober, and connected.

This time I didn’t lie.

*If think you may be an alcoholic and want to learn more click here.

*If you think you may have a drub problem click here, and if you know that you’re an addict please check yourself into rehab. It’s a matter of your life and death.

XO

Vasavi