Keepin’ It Real: Is your past controlling you?

Does your mind constantly replay your old mistakes, over and over?

Is your inner voice holding you back by always reminding you about “That time when…”,  making you hesitate and doubt yourself?

Then you’ll really dig this week’s question.

Barbara asks: “My past is totally getting in the way of me. Every relationship, every conversation, the way I treat myself is totally driven by my past. Why aren’t I moving forward, and can you share how to move past my past?”

Whenever anyone brings up grappling with their old demons, people are always quick to respond “Oh, your past is your past. It’s already gone, done, and over with. You just need to move on.” And while that’s a valid point… it’s never that simple.

Everyone’s past comes up to bug them from time to time – that’s part of being human.

But there’s an important mindset shift few people mention that can really help you let go and push yourself forward.

Check it out!

We are not our minds. We are not our bodies. We are not our thoughts. They are the way we perceive our experience in this lifetime, but they are not who we are. Remember: you have more control over your mind than your mind does over you

This week, practice being, thinking, speaking and doing in the now. When you focus on being totally aware in the present, all that anxiety about the future and victimization surrounding your past vanishes.

Start noticing when your mind is trying to take you in reverse. Share what you’re doing with the people you trust, and have them point out when they notice you’re regressing.

Practice makes perfect of course, but when you honor your process of staying in the present, the only way you can go is forward.

How do you stay in the now? What are some of your favorite tips for shaking off the unpleasantness that’s behind you? I’d love to hear about it! Leave your story in the comments here, or shoot me an email at

And if you’re SERIOUS about  moving past your past, I have JUST the thing for you. Check out S.O.U.R.C.E. to get your free mindset training videos. We talk about moving past your past AND so much more (you just have to watch to find out) ;).